We Love Santana Lopez

I recently discovered an amazing fact—the keyword that sends the most people from Google to VampWKNT is…”glee santana.” We have received around five times more Googlers who searched “glee santana” than searched “vampire weeknight.” I feel great about this, as Santana has quickly skyrocketed to become my Favorite Secondary Character on Glee (just ahead of her bff and sometimes lover Brittany).

Nothing would make me happier than becoming the Internet’s expert resource on all things Santana Lopez—but unfortunately all we have provided these Googlers is one lousy post documenting Santana’s shining moment of Season 1—her sexting speech to Quinn. But I want to give my Googlers more! So, I turned to the best source I know for Gleeformation: the incredibly janky yet somehow official Fox.com Glee wiki, which has an excellent (and janky) post about Santana!

So, here are eight fascinating factoids about Santana gleaned from the trusty Glee wiki:

1. I must admit. Until writing this post, I did not know Santana’s last name was Lopez, nor that she was played by one “Naya Rivera.” One can only wonder how to pronounce her first name!

2. This is what Santana looks like a) with her hair down and b) without a Cheerios uniform. Love her as I do, I would not recognize her IRL.

3. So much information packs such a punch!: 1) She is only 16. 2) Why are they questioning her singing abilities? Whenever she finally gets to solo “Kiss Me Through the Phone” or whatever, we are all going to be blown away, obvi. 3) This wiki-writer really summarizes Santana nicely: She IS really mean and DOES love boys. And her weakness is mos’ def Puck. Santy needs to get a grip.

4. This list is actually really well done. I first began to love Santana when she was flirting it up with Puck. Everything changed when she deemed her texts to hot to erase. I LOVE Brittany so much, and her acceptance of Santana makes me know Santana has a good heart. Also, their banter about the duck was pretty amazing. But Santana really wins it all with her spunky personality and those rare moments where she lets her inner warmth shine through.

5. She IS kind of bitch (assuming it’s bitch? Someone needs to tell wiki-writer that you can’t bleep out ALL the letters), but that’s what’s great about her. And Kurt insults Rachel way worse than Santana insults Kurt. But, I will give points when points are due—Santana WAS mean to Quinn, even though she DID know what she was going through. But everybody makes mistakes. I take the two blank bullet points as a reminder that it’s really hard to think of things to hate about Santana.

6. “Keep your paws off my man. Clear?…Don’t play stupid tubbers. Oh, and for the record, asking someone to babysit with you is super 90’s…Oh wake up. While you two were babysitting, Puck and I were sexting…Sexy texting? Seriously, what era are you from? While you two were…playing house…Puck and I were trading super hot texts. Why don’t you check his cell phone? Because my sexts…are too hot to erase.”

7. I have no idea who Matt Rutherford is!?!?!??!?!?! Also, some additional trivia from Wikipedia: Rivera drew on her own high school experience of unpopularity to prepare for the role, as well as watching films such as Mean Girls to “really get in the zone and feel like a bitchy Sophomore”.

8. The awkward silence between Brittany and Santana was probably my favorite part of the finale no joke. Here’s hoping for some more “best episodes & scenes” to come, as Santana’s role is being “bumped up” for the back nine!

This may be the most random post ever to be written on VampWKNT.