2 years ago
“When can I start eating hard cheeses again, Doctor?”
Liz Lemon, 4x14, “30 Rock”
2 years ago
He’s a tourist. He vacations in people’s lives, takes pictures, put them in a scrapbook, and moves on. All he’s interested in is stories. Basically, Leslie, he’s selfish, and you’re not, and that’s why you don’t like him.
»Ron Swanson to Leslie Knope, on her new boyfriend, “Parks and Recreation,” 2x16
2 years ago
Look, the biggest truths aren’t original. Truth is ketchup. It’s Jim Belushi. It’s job isn’t to blow our minds; it’s to be within reach.
»Jeff Winger (Joel McHale), “Community,” 1x14
2 years ago
He has the brains of George Clooney in the body of Joe Biden.
»Leslie Knope on her ideal man, “Parks and Recreation,” 2x13
2 years ago
There isn’t a woman alive who doesn’t love diamonds. Even the super left-wing chicks that saw “Blood Diamond” and cried…when they get a diamond…they like, ‘Yeahh bitch. Gimme more of dem blood diamonds. Make dem extra bloody.’
»Tom Haverford, “Parks and Recreation,” 2x12
2 years ago
To me, religion is like Paul Rudd. I see the appeal, and I wouldn’t take it away from anyone, but I also would never stand in line for it.
»Jeff Winger, “Community,” 1x12
2 years ago
I’ve made some empty promises in my life. But, hands down, that was the most generous.
»Michael Scott, “The Office,” 6x12
2 years ago
I can cry on demand. It’s one of my many talents. I am very versatile. And aside from nudity and the exploitation of animals, I’ll do pretty much anything to break into the business.
»Rachel Berry, “Glee,” 1x12
2 years ago
Your sweet potatoes are bland.
»Eric van der Woodsen, “Gossip Girl,” 3x11
2 years ago
Is there any chance the death could come before the vomiting?
»Adrian Monk, “Monk,” 8x15, Series Finale Part I
2 years ago
These are the same people who said my great grandfather was a monkey! If he was a monkey, then why was he killed by a monkey?
»Kenneth the Page, “30 Rock,” 4x06
2 years ago
It means you think I’m very young, and it’s hard for you to stand close to me!
»Rachel Berry to Mr. Schuester, “Glee,” 1x10
2 years ago
gossip girl, 3x10
- Olivia Burke: I read that being a movie star has a certain...cache.
- Blair Waldorf: Oh, yes. I think I read that at the dentist.
2 years ago
Liz Lemon, you are blowing up like a balloon with a grenade in it.
»Tracy Jordan, “30 Rock,” 4x05
2 years ago
The reason Blair attacked you is because she misses you. Don’t tell me after eighteen years, you can’t read Waldorf subtext.
»Chuck Bass to Serena Van Der Woodsen, “Gossip Girl,” 3x08
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